Three guys are convicted1 of a very serious crime. They're all sentenced2 to twenty years in solitary3 confinement4.
   They're each allowed one thing to bring into the cell with them. The first guy asks for a big stack5 of books. The second guy asks for his wife. And the third guy asks for two hundred cartons6 of cigarettes.
   At the end of the twenty years, they open up7 the first guy's cell. He comes out and says:
   "I studied so hard. I'm so bright now, I could be a lawyer8. It was terrific."
   They open up the second guy's door. He comes out with his wife, and they've got five new kids. He says:
   "It was the greatest thing of my life. My wife and I have never been so close. I have a beautiful new family. I love it."
   They open up the third guy's door, and he's slapping9 at his pockets going...
   "Anybody got a match10?"